Tag: seasons

Posted in Moments and Musings

August 2024

Posted on by Vikki Lynn Sorensen

Happy September! I don’t know about you but I’m so ready to see the end of summer. I know the official start of fall isn’t until September 21, but I tend to celebrate the meteorological calendar a bit more. It just makes more sense to me.

That means Fall is here!!

I have to tell you; out of all the seasons, summer is my least favorite. As a 55-year-old woman living in the heart of her menopause years, the heat and I are not friends. The idea of walking outside and breathing in water is not fun. I’m not a fan of the oppressiveness high humidity lends to a hot day. August always feels like it’s the hottest month of the year for no good reason other than just to be August.

You may have guessed by now – August is my least favorite month. I’m way too antsy for Fall. Around halfway through the month, I suddenly get a craving for pumpkin flavored things. I want to wear boots and scarves and curl up in oversized thick sweaters on a rainy day.

William Faulkner said:

“Some days in late August at home are like this, the air thin and eager like this, with something in it sad and nostalgic and familiar.”

That pretty much sums up my general emotional state except the air was not thin. It was very hot and humid with heat indexes up to 115 degrees. But it was nostalgic, in a way.

I feel like I’ve come full circle somehow. When my mom was alive, my girls and I would join her every Saturday evening for Mass at St. Gilbert’s church. Then afterwards, we always went to a neighborhood restaurant for dinner. Living out my faith beside my mom was very special to me, especially during the holidays.

Living so close to my dad and stepmom, I’ve started to attend Saturday night Mass with them along with my sister and occasionally my daughter, Shelby. Afterwards, we find a local restaurant and enjoy a meal together. It’s amazing how much comes back to me and how much of my Catholic faith never left. I feel my mom sharing this with me in a way and I absolutely love how much it means to my 91 year old Dad to have his kids and grandkids attending with him. It’s changed me.

Of course, I will always love my other church, and I watch the recordings of services during the week online but being with my dad and sharing this with him is something I know I’ll remember and cherish long after he’s in the arms of Jesus.

As I stated earlier, August is not my favorite month. Covid visited me at the beginning of the month, so that was fun. I felt like death warmed over and the congestion was just great (insert sarcasm). Mucinex was a huge life saver for me as was my sister who, during her time off work, took my daughter to work and picked her up for me so I could get as much rest as possible. She also took care of my dog so…huge shout out thanks to Kathleen! She was the MVP of my covid week. I joked that I went back to Mass and came home with Covid but I’m not too sure people thought that funny, so I stopped. It must have just been a coincidence that the first time I went to Mass since my mom’s passing and the next day, I started feeling ill.

I also stayed down here in my room in the basement for a whole week which was a very hot week at that. Thankfully, as my fever broke, so did the weather and it was total joy to be back in the living room with my family.

Just a quick note. I was very careful to stay away from my family as much as possible however, I would do that regardless of whether it was covid or a simple cold. We all lead busy lives and a huge part of that includes my 91-year-old dad, who doesn’t need to get sick. Plus, being sick sucks and I’m not interested in spreading it around. There are more people living with me now, so I felt it best to be prudent.

But enough of that! I’m much better now, Praise God!

August did bring me the sweetest news ever.

I am going to be a grandma!!

Yes, my daughter and son-in-law are expecting their first child in March 2025. I’m beyond thrilled and so very excited for them. Emilie is truly living the life she’s prayed for all her life, and I am so thankful to God for all the blessings pouring out on them. They also bought their first house! God is just so good.

It’s times like this when I wish my mom was still here. Of course, I always wish for her and always will. Since she died, everything good that happens, every joyful moment, is always tainted with a tiny particle of grief and longing. I imagine it always will be.

Nevertheless, this baby is already a blessing and will be the first of a new generation in our family. I can’t wait to meet him or her! I can’t wait to be “Grammy”! Now more than ever, I need to get serious about getting into shape. I want no restrictions on the number of activities I can do with my grandbabies. I want to do it all with them!

Which brings us to the goal-setting part of this gab fest. I love setting goals! I love to plan out what I want to do with my life. I love to write it down on a list and then cross off tasks as I complete them. Therefore, here’s some goals I have going into September.

Be content. I love my new home so much. It’s not perfect. It doesn’t have to be. This house has brought me the best of both worlds. I can be alone, if I want some alone time. Or I can be with people. Before moving here, I decided living alone was really not for me.  

Now, I’m not talking about being in a relationship. I’m NOT relationship material. I’m not interested. I’m way too old and romance isn’t really my strong suit, so I steer clear. If I want romance in my life, I’m more than happy to grab a mug of tea and embrace the couch life while watching the Hallmark channel. There, I can stream romance at any time of the year and in any season.

Prioritize my health. I’m not joining any diet culture or keeping track of everything I eat. That really only stresses me out which leads to more unhealthy eating. Just taking longer and longer walks as the days grow cold. Encouraging those in my household to do the same. Focus more on portions than the actual contents of my plate. Forgive myself for bad food moments.

Be a better steward of my money. The closer I get to 65, the more I realize that I do want to experience some retirement years before going home to Jesus. I want to crochet, embroider, travel all over, and be at my grandbabies’ beck and call. That’s my plan. Some changes I’m committing myself to make may seem small, but everyone has to start somewhere.

For example, I’ve been able to cancel some streaming services and started using my library more. Hoopla is a wonderful app and much of what I like to watch is available for free almost anytime I want.

Coffee is a huge expense for me. Not only do I like all the frou-frou coffees, but I also tend to buy a pastry to go with it. Thanks to the wonder of Pinterest, I’ve found some easy recipes I want to try. I also discovered a few cool techniques. That, combined with the fact that Shelby used to work for Starbucks and knows several tips and tricks herself, should help save money.

Finally, I’m declaring a yarn buying ban in September. We’ll see if I actually meet this goal. I have so much yarn!!

Increase my skill as an artist. Artist! I choke on that word! I still cannot define myself as an artist of any kind since I’ve never really created anything original. I do want to be praying on that, though. I know there’s a purpose for this desire to create something. I want to be a blessing and am actively seeking opportunities.

Enhance my personal sense of style. Working from home so much really has put a huge dent in my sense of fashion. I have no idea what I like anymore and would like to put more of an effort into dressing up more for Mass, other church events and even going out to Friday night dinners.

For far too long, I’ve looked in the mirror only to see a fat, frumpy, middle-aged woman looking back. I’m ready to change that. I see plus-sized women all around me who are beautiful having a strong sense of classical fashion and I want in on it. I’ve always prided myself on being a Walmart girl and you know what? There’s nothing wrong with that when that’s all your budget allows. At this time of my life, I want a little more. I want to make quality purchases on quality clothing that will carry me into my grandma years. I want to be beautiful, and I want clothes that make me feel beautiful.

Take one Pinterest idea and make it a reality. While it’s fun to scroll through Pinterest and pin idea after idea, I find doing too much of it makes me restless. I want to be a doer, not just a pinner. I want to make my dreams a reality even if it is just something decorative to hang on a wall.

Well, the coffee pot is empty now as is my coffee mug. I hope you enjoyed this first gab session! Maybe you have a cool coffee recipe or a crochet pattern. Feel free to drop me a note and share anything that’s on your heart. Prayer requests included. I’m happy to be praying with you and for you for anything you may be believing God for.

Happy September!

Philippians 4:13 (NLT)

“For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”

    Posted in Moments and Musings

    Out of Darkness and Into the Light

    Posted on by Vikki Lynn Sorensen

    We made it! Daylight savings time has begun and this girl doesn’t even mind losing an hour of sleep for more daylight.

    Like many others, I tend to suffer from some seasonal depression. I had hoped to head it off at the pass by doing some extra holiday celebrating, watching my diet, being more active, journaling – I had a whole laundry list of things I planned to do to stave off the winter blues.

    It didn’t go so well.

    I did do some extra Christmas celebrating but much of the season was spent alone. Sometimes, I think I go through this stuff to give me perspective and create some empathy. I’m not very good at keeping in touch with people yet I know there are folks who also were lonely during these past holidays and I did nothing to alleviate that. Perhaps, I’ll do better next time around.

    I did watch my diet….go right down the drain. Boredom drove it. Too much alone time begets too much boredom time which begets the consumption of way too much chocolate. All delivered by multiple Walmart delivery drivers who, I’m sure, gathering in hushed places to pray against me putting in another order.

    I did journal. Some handwritten scribbles in a small journal that I keep. Each entry ended with the number of days until the next exciting event in my life.

    Oh, it wasn’t as bad as all that!

    January brought us some nice snow storms and an ice storm, which was fun. I learned the new meaning of anxiety driving in those.

    Speaking of…when did I get to be so afraid of driving in the snow. I’M FROM CHICAGO!!!! I learned to drive in the snow. I managed my first ice storm driving from the north side of the city to Schaumburg. It took four hours but my mother sat alongside me and coached me the whole way. Somehow, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve understood the financial impact accompanying the phrase “car accident” and a few drops of moisture on the road means this girl stays home.

    Thank God I work from home!

    February started out really icy. I mean double digits below zero icy. Lots of tea and hot chocolate were consumed. Lots of coffee, too. I went into sort of a hibernation, on the couch, underneath covers with only my hands free to type enabling me to keep my job.

    But then it got warm. Really warm. Not turn-my-AC-on warm (almost, though – if only I wasn’t too lazy to clean it!) but warm enough to turn on my fan and pull out a pair of shorts and a tank top. I wasn’t ready for this! I mean, I still need to mow down the winter forest growth on my legs that kept me warm all winter! Percy, my little canine heater, couldn’t understand why I didn’t want him sleeping up against me.

    Too warm for February!!

    And by the way, people in the north who cry over cold weather and snow in February should have their heads examined – it’s February. Winter! It’s supposed to be cold and it’s supposed to snow! What it’s not supposed to do is get up to 70+ degrees!

    Sheesh!

    Even the tulips outside the main doors to my apartment building began emerging from the ground. I wanted to throw a blanket over them and say, “wait, little ones! It’s not time yet! Too early!” but they continued to wriggle their way into the world.

    They’re half grown now and I expect buds any day.

    February’s exit confused me. The unseasonal warmth brought too much hope and too much wanting for Spring. The bright, sunshiny days lifted my seasonally dreary spirits and I began to think strange thoughts like, “Today is great day for a nice long walk”. Well, strange for this couch potato body, anyway.

    Ah well. One thing I did do well during this dark season was create. That was on my list. I made blanket after blanket after blanket. I tried new recipes, some were hits and a few were misses. I journaled ideas and plotted and planned and even rediscovered my love for embroidery.

    So the season wasn’t a total loss.

    If I’m being serious, it wasn’t a loss at all. All this quiet time and alone time has given me perspective. To say the season was a loss would mean I’m ungrateful which I’m not at all. Everything has a reason and a season and I always love to see what God does through and with it all. He’s just the best ever!

    However…WE MADE IT!!! Daylight savings is here! Light is here! Days are longer! Tulips can grow! And yes, I’ll shave my legs before I put shorts on again and I will take that long walk!

    SPRING FORWARD!

    Photo by Jitendra Sharma on Unsplash

    Posted in Moments and Musings

    This New Season

    Posted on by Vikki Lynn Sorensen

    A few short years ago, both my girls were planning to get a place of their own. I sat looking through apartment listings (just for fun), looking at one-bedroom places and dreaming of how I would decorate it without any input from anyone else. I pinned meals “for the single gal” to my Pinterest page and thought about how grand it would be to have the whole TV all to myself.

    I could do what I wanted when I wanted. The ultimate single life.

    We moved in here and shortly after, Emilie got married. And then there were two.

    Emilie has always been my “big idea” girl. Big dreams. Bigger plans. So full of sparkling conversation. She outwardly expresses everything and this lead to hours upon hours of endless chatter. She filled my days with talking. I honestly can’t remember a time in her life when she wasn’t talking. So many late night talks, some full of fear but most filled with faith and a lot of tears.

    But Shelby isn’t like that. She doesn’t have huge dreams.

    Shelby works an overnight job and sleeps during the day. She has her own set of nerdy friends she prefers to spend time with, which is very normal for a girl like her. I want to give her that
    space. I don’t want her to feel like she’s her mother’s entertainment committee. The few times she’s decided to spend her day with me has been a gift and I’ve made the most of it. Her big ambition right now is to work, make some money, and play video games with her friends. Even when she is with me, she’s quiet. There’s never been a ton of conversation that’s
    happened between us.

    So, my home when from being loud to being very quiet.

    In the beginning, I took advantage of it. But it wasn’t long before conversations with Jesus
    turned into mindless chatter with either myself or with the dog. (He doesn’t ever engage. He usually just licks himself and finds a new comfortable space on my chair.)

    Now, that season is ending. I just bought a house with my sister. And my other sister (there’s four of us girls in my family) will be moving in with us along with Shelby. My very quiet, boring existence is about to be replaced with conversation and activity once more.

    I can’t wait!

    Moving to my current home was a huge blessing. We moved right in the middle of 2020 from a super small apartment to this one. My old apartment was only a mile away from the home we shared with my mom for 12 years. It was the home that healed us from a painful divorce. It was my mother’s house and for 12 years, we were secure and stable.

    Then we lost her and everything changed.

    The two years we spent in that first apartment after she died were so full of grief and pain and adjustment and just emptiness. We had no family nearby. My girls and I clung to each other and together, we held onto Jesus. But that grief – it was so hard to heal. I remember when we moved into this place, it almost felt like I was leaving my grief behind. So much closer to my sister, this place gave me breathing room, and not just literally.

    It changed everything.

    Being close to people who I loved and who loved me was the healing balm I needed. We healed together, in a way. God blessed us so much in this place and in this current season.

    God gave me this season and I have not squandered it.

    But now it’s time for the next step in my life. To go back to living in a space where I can put color on my walls and have my own laundry (it’s the little things). I won’t just be close to family; I’ll be living with family and closest I’ve been to my dad and stepmom in decades.

    The challenge now is to stay in an attitude of gratitude. I’ve got just under 2 months until we move into our house – hopefully, our forever home.

    Seasonal transitions are hard because the closer you get to the new season, the less tolerant you are of the season you’re in. It’s easy to get edgy and start to dislike what once was a blessing.

    I’m determined not to let that happen to me. I love my home. I love every minute here. And before I leave, I want to pray over it, touch each wall and walk its floors one more time. I want to leave a bit of Jesus here. I want the next family to feel peace, love, comfort, and healing when they want through the door – just as I did.

    When I get to my new home, I’ll do the same. Touch the walls. Walk the floors. Speak Jesus to it all. This home was a home of healing but the next home…that will be a home full of joy!

    Photo by Tierra Mallorca on Unsplash