Posted in Crochet

Fuzzy and Warm Crochet

I’m a scroller.

I get on Instagram or Pinterest each night when I go to bed and I scroll through both, pinning ideas to a virtual board or saving them to a new collection.

I have tons of yarn and tons of patterns and ideas saved to both. Yet still, the second I see something new that inspires me, I have to go for it. Such as was this blanket.

The actual pattern and idea for this can be found at https://cjdesignblog.com/not-your-abuelitas-blanket/ and it’s called Not Your Abuelitas Blanket.

I couldn’t wait to make this. Now, here’s the thing. It’s important to know your yarn, I believe. I’d never worked with Bernat blanket yarn before this project so I struggled with this just a bit as a beginner to chunky yarn.

Yet I persevered and within a week, I had a happy pile of perfect squares.

I also subbed out a few colors since my Joann’s didn’t have the exact colors in the pattern. No worries. This is where creativity comes in (and where I start to battle the perfectionist side of me).

Joining them was another story and something I really do need to practice with this grade of yarn. Nevertheless, I did my own thing here and I don’t think it came out too bad.

This blanket is on my bed now as my fall covering and I have to say I love it! My blanket base is a simple white cotton quilt on which I like to add seasonal, handmade accents from blankets to pillows (eventually). It’s very soft and just that right weight and warmness (my own word) not to overheat this very menopausal girl.

This pattern – total hit for me! So glad I made it and I can’t wait to make more and perfect this technique.

Posted in Moments and Musings

My Christmas Carol

Driving around, taking care of some errands the other day with my daughter, Shelby, and she turned on some Christmas music. The Little Drummer Boy by the Harry Simeone Chorale came on. I was instantly transformed to being 10 and sitting alongside my mom in the car listening to her sing along. This was always her favorite Christmas carol.

This year marks the 5th year celebrating the holiday season without my mother. I miss her. I miss her excitement at having the family together. I miss her making her grocery shopping lists only to still go up and down each aisle “just in case I forgot something”.

I miss her voice. Her presence. Her very nature which turned my house into a home for so many years. I miss the way she’d have a story to tell about the ornaments we still put on our tree. I miss her stuffing, which is famous in my family. (This is my first year making it without her.) I miss her eyes lighting up at the idea of a night filled with Christmas movies and a bit of hot cocoa.

I commented to Shelby how much I hate having this love/hate relationship with the holidays. I love this time of year so very much. The cold weather. The fireplaces. The cinnamon. The cookies. The tree. Family gatherings. Dad’s magic Brandy Alexanders and “religious experience” cookies. I love it all!

But I hate that she’s not here. And so much has changed for me this year. My daughter became a wife and my mother wasn’t here to see it. I’m getting my life ready to buy a house which is something I haven’t done since I was married. So many changes, big and small and she’s not here for any of it. Somehow, I feel it more acutely at Christmas time.

People say, “this is life and you have just keep moving forward” and I do. Lots ahead. Grandbabies to come some day. A new home to build. Family outings and trips to take. That’s in addition to the day to day living I get to do quite comfortably surrounded by the love of my family.

So this year, like the 4 behind me and the many ahead of me, I’ll hold her memory tightly to my chest and let it be a salve to my heart. I’ll put up the tree. Make her stuffing. Hang ornaments, both new and old. I’ll pull out THE family cookie recipe and make a batch or two with Hallmark Christmas movies playing on the big screen.

And I’ll remember her, over and over again. Yet in the midst of the pain, there will be peace.

Who knows? I just might pull out one of her silly Christmas vests she used to wear.

Yes, I know it’s blurry but this was the best Christmas photo I have of her.